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I write sins not tragedies Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "ctorpey" journal:

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July 24th, 2011
03:27 pm

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I'm avoiding getting ready for work. I go back today after a week of camping. It was a lot of fun, but turned into parenting children that were not my own. It kind of tied my tubes up extra tight. I got an email from a random lady that wants her daughter to takes lessons. This is great. However, the email seemed very shady. It was written poorly. Sounded like someone writing where English isn't the first language. I got two emails from two different email addresses. I sent one back after the first one kindly letting her know I am only working through UD's CMS and gave her the link and explained the costs and when the semester starts. I got the second email from her from a completely different address and she basically disregarded everything I said and was asking when she could write a check and that she's in Hawaii right now and that her daughter is in Europe with her aunt. It was all kinda goofy. I kindly emailed her back again letting her know I am only working through the CMS. If she wants to take lessons she needs to register through them and pay through them. I'm sure someone recommended me to her, but it's all coming off odd because she didn't take in the information I gave her. Oh well.

Ken and I might have a house by Nov. Long story short a house we looked at that was advertised as "not a short sale." has turned into a short sale. The sellers accepted our offer and now we're waiting for them to sign the contract and we'll sign it after they do. Then we wait for the bank and a million other stupid steps. When we get this house (I'm being confident!) we'll be back in NJ. It's good to go back because I'm a little over DE and because of Gov. Christie, if I found a job in NJ and got it I'd have to live in NJ. All public employees must live/move into NJ for the job. He's a dingy...but whatever. I need to make myself available for any possible job opportunities.

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June 29th, 2011
09:01 am

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I've lost some weight since trying to eat better and stay more diligent on exercising. It's pretty dang excited. I wore my belt yesterday and I can put it at the 4th notch easily! I'm making my way back to that 5th notch. I'm not going crazy over losing weight this time. I went a month without weighing myself and felt okay. The elliptical we bought broke....after 4 months. I'm not trying to deal with it because it's a piece of s***. I got it off walmart.com. I should have known better. For now, I'm using the apartment's little gym. It's nice and fine for now. I only bought an elliptical because I like to work out in the morning and when I need to be leaving by 6am I have to get up at 4am and the apt. gym isn't open then. Dad has an extra NordicTrak that he is going to give me. I used it while at it house and it helped me lose weight the first time so I'm going back to it.

Ken and I are starting to look at houses. He's over the apt. and the neighbors that are loud and have a dog that barks for hours when they leave (which is happening right now at 8:59am...it's been going on since 8:30am). It's a tough situation because we want to complain, but he works with this lady. It's really lame. So we're looking around. There are some nice townhouses and a few houses that we can afford. We have a down payment sitting in the bank so that will help. It's all pretty exciting stuff. Hopefully we can find something good.

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June 18th, 2011
12:17 pm

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Saturday Saturday
It's Saturday and I'm trying to avoid getting in the shower. If I get in the shower, then I have to get ready for work....and I don't want that. Summer time at Target has been okay so far. I'm tired of being tried to be put into my duties when I don't want that. I think the manager feels that if they do that I'll stay when I'm done school. That is not going to happen. That will only happen if I cannot find enough subbing days to keep me afloat.

I have one placement set for student teaching. During the second half of the semester I will be at Delsea Regional HS. I know I will be taking over the band ASAP and then slowly taking over theory and the music technology course. The co-op is very nice and laid back. In TNL B, we were at his class for three weeks. I had a good rapport with the students when conducting. It makes me feel a little more confident about teaching there. Still a little scared though. My elementary placement was mailed on Thursday. It's waiting at my dad's for me to pick it up. I'll find out on Monday when I have a day off. To tag on to this school talk, the financial aid office let me know that I've maxed out my undergraduate loans...so now I need to find another way to pay for this semester. I tried Sallie Mae and they said no unless I get a co-signer. I do not want to put my mom in that situation. THere's the NJClass loan that I'll try. My mom got money through them before. Hopefully I can get the funds so I can finish my school time out and finally grow up.

Practicing has been lacking extremely. I feel guilty when I don't. I just feel exhausted after work/ feel like there's so much to take care of in the apartment before work. My goal is to make the time for practicing. I have to get over the fear of bothering the neighbors in the apartment. I practice at noon or 1pm. They should be awake. Have plenty of excerpts to practice, but I'd like some more real rep. That is all.

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March 29th, 2011
10:24 pm

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Blah
My grandma just passed away. I feel shakey, confused, and kinda empty. I don't know how to feel. I've never had anyone this close pass. I've had a great grandmother, a great aunt and great uncle pass, but I was too young to really think about them.

My grandma was sweet and made rock hard blueberry pancakes. I love her.

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January 22nd, 2011
01:51 pm

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School is starting again. I have one semester of classes, student teach in the fall and then the real world, finally. I am excited to get to that point, but nervous. I survived Fall 2010 hell semester to have another one come this spring. I'm being more pro-active and will not be a procrastinator this time. I usually am not, but last semester it just happened. I got a 98 on the ridiculously hard 200+ page resource notebook. The teacher love my lessons and unit plan!!Dr. L is so hard to please. I struggled immensely in the class. I basically failed the teaching midterm and worked my ass off to improve. It was worth it. Got a B+ in the class.

Ken and I are starting to plan wedding stuff. Money is the biggest issue. My dad says he'll help while conveniently omitting how much. We're trying to save. It's slow and the bank accounts aren't growing fast. I just wish dad would be like 'You're my last girl. I'll cover it all!" That would be a miracle for sure. It won't be that much. It sounds like Ken's sister's wedding is reaching around $25,000. HOLY SHEESH. Ours budgeted out is below $10,000.

My non practicing student dutifully returns every semester. I hope she starts to practice. When she does there is great improvement. Maybe I'll get a few more this semester! I could use the money.

I hate Target. I'm over the whole situation, but I cannot find a job at this time that will accomodate weekends only and pay more than Target. It sucks big time. Eventually I will be done there. I will not stay there after I'm done school. I will find something else...ANYTHING. Managers aren't very respectful. They pressure/guilt you into coming in to work or twist your words. I was hung up on by a manager when I called out one day. I think I've called out 4 times in the 1+ year I've been there. I know ppl that call out at least twice a month and nothing happens. Oh well.

Someday I'll be married, teaching, and doing what I want! YAY!

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December 16th, 2010
06:30 pm

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Officially off the market
Ken proposed while we were decorating our tree! I said yes :-) Really made the day of finals much better. Soo stupidly happy right now!

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December 15th, 2010
08:45 am

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It's moving day!!!! I'm amped! That is all for now :-)

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November 3rd, 2010
08:36 am

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Minor update
The election was interesting yesterday....split government. Either this will force people to work together or there is going to be a lot more hate for government because they won't budge. I'm still not too sure about the tea party. I listened to Rand Paul's speech from last night. He talks about the people creating jobs and taking responsibility for themselves...I do agree with this. However, he then said that we need to remove government from creating jobs. Maybe it's me being an A-hole, but didn't government create Mr. Rand's position some 200+ years ago? So should Mr. Rand not accept his new position because government created it? If FDR didn't create programs like Social Security with his New Deals would we have gotten out of the Depression? I dunno. I think people forget government is in place to oversee and step in when neccessary, the parents if you will. That's just my thought...There's a bajillion other opinions as well.

On a better note, Ken and I are MOVING!!!! It's official. On Dec. 15, were out of Dad's house and moving to a nice apt. in Delaware. We are being magically swept away to...Delaware. It's pretty exciting news. Maria has been back for two weeks and it is stressful in the house. Dad snaps at her everyday for something and she's touching all our Stuff. Yesterday dad told her keep the drapes closed downstairs because some houses were broken into a few streets over. Ken and I have all of our worldly possessions downstairs s if she opens the shades for all to see I'm gonna be pretty pissed. She just doesn't listen well sometimes...most of the time. So that's another reason to be excited to be out. We're counting down...43 days!

But that's it for now. Maybe I'll keep with my plan and update more frequently. We shall see.

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August 19th, 2010
01:20 pm

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Good deal.
Sooooooooooooooooooo....I passed Praxis II Music content knowledge!!!! I was worried because I only felt confident that I got half of the questions right. I got a 172! I needed a 158 because that's PA's requirement. So now I can apply to jobs in NJ, PA, DE, and MD. I know there is one extra praxis that n eeds to be taken for PA, but I haven't figured out what it is yet. I need to research that. I'm going to save that test for in the Spring. I'm just excited that I can student teach next fall. I'm getting closer to being done.

Besides that, I'm tired of target. Only 1.5 weeks left until school then it's just back to weekends there. i'm hoping to find something different for the spring so I can qui-zit that place. If I can get my classes down to 2 days a week and put my name as a sub in a bajillion different school districts hopefully I'd be able to get 3 days of subbing a week which would be enough to say "Goodbye!" to Target.

Ken has an interview for the Director position he applied for! It's really good news! Hopefully he blows them away and he gets the jobby.

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July 30th, 2010
09:37 am

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Yay Friday!
It's finally Friday! All the days blend together anymore because of the ridiculously changing schedule at Target. I really can't wait to get a teaching job and be done with Target. It's an okay job...but some of the managers are beyond serious b/c this is all they have. They never point out the good things, only acknowledging what needs to be fixed or isn't looking good. That's not how you keep your workers motivated. I hope the manager figured that out last night when I was pretty much a bitch to her all night. She was constantly up my ass and was just rude about everything. I can't deal with that. Unfortunatley, I can't get many students privately to say goodbye to the place. Oh well, school starts in a month and I'll be back to just Fri, Sat, and Sun. That's when they'll be hurting and be missing me and some other of my friends there that work hard and have school.

Today's weather is absolutely GORGEOUS! Low humidity, low temperature.......I'll get to enjoy the end of the day when I'm done work at 7. Ken has the whole weekend off :-) but I'll be working all of it :-(

I'm excited, next Friday is our friends Davey and Emily's wedding!! It's at the Inn surrounded by woods just outside of Philly. It looks really cool. I was able to find a dress and undergarments andd only paid $34...major sale score. haha That's about it really, my clarinet is good. I need to order some new solos...I need a change from etudes, exercises, and excerpts. Ken set up a beach weekend for my birthday!! I'm so excited about it. We didn't get to go to Rehoboth this summer so I'm amped. That beach is so nice, has great food, and has Dogfish Head brewery and brew pub!! YUM all over :-)

Thattttttttttttttttttt's it

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